Continuously losing myself and finding out who I am today is something that I have learned has taken place multiple times and will happen time and time again.
I use my job, my religious and spiritual experiences and just life to find myself.
This is about sharing my experiences and my lessons for myself in truth to continue to write and remember that when in a time of loss and confusion there is always a way back to the answer.
Today was one of those down right messed up days. It started off with a horrible run where I tripped and banged up my right side. No joke, my entire right side! Mainly hand ad knee of course. When that occurred I continued running thinking I was ok not knowing how banged up I was until about 5 minutes later when I felt light headed and saw blood seeping through my pants. So I walked the rest of the way (kind of). After that may day didn't get any better. I went to beans and brew to do homework, study and call some places for work. With homework, kinesiology is kickin my butt! Fyi Lisa you are a life saver thank you oh so very much for the help! I spent all day trying to figure it out but that stuff just takes time for me to understand. While calling people up all I got were more nos. I am so sick of this. I am beginning to think I just suck at interviews or just suck in general. This job searching things tends to bring my morale down. On a good note I am at some free concert with alysha who came down to Slc with her friends. So far fun time here. A lot has changed for the both of us since we last hung out. Ok do it wasn't that terrible but I just can't take not working and being rejected so much. Till next time Nicoly!
Today was oh so much fun. I did homework, then went to Corner Bakery with Mckenzie! First time going and I loved it! i gotta go there more often. After the fact we went to the living planet aquarium. that place is sooo tiny but it was oh so much fun. the was pretty much it for the day other than the weekly ab lab and zumba (always puts a smile on my face even when i get crappy news before hand.
What is this crappy news you speak of well... apparently I didn't get the Job. I know it shouldn't be a big deal but I can't keep on looking for work. I really am just tempted to give up on this whole idea that I can get a simple job. WTF?
Anywho... I really am writing this blog because I wanted to tell you what I learned today while studying and doing school work. It's more stuff I already know and that I have been working on but this has emphasized it even more. are you ready for this.... according to my classes and the way my body reacts to food I need to go lactose, gluten, soy and egg free. The egg thing I can do to some extent, everything is made lactose free now a days and gluten might be a little difficult but I can handle that and honestly I am such a soy hater that i won't even have to worry about that. the most difficult part of it all is bringing that all together. I love all kinds of foods that have at least one of those things in it. Usually as well when you make a healthy alternative that has substitutes it's only substitutes for one item. take pancakes for instance: there are eggless pancakes, wheatless pancakes, and usually it is easy to get rid of lactose out of pancakes. but have you ever seen a gluten, soy, lactose, egg free pancake? I am experimenting with somethings that come out yummy but it doesn't really end up being a pancake. it becomes more like gooey dough. I will figure it out! the weird thing is that I have so many items in my fridge that have eggs, gluten and/or lactose so I am trying to get rid of it all before I go shopping for more food (yes I am that person). I needed to get rid of everything with eggs cause that isn't helping me at all but with lactose and gluten items they don't harm me as much so if I just eat them in moderation and slowly get rid of it I shall be set. FYI the one thing that makes me happy is that spelt is technically not gluten!!! which means I still get to have the yummiest bread in all of Utah. Now I just need to find a gluten, eggless challah or try to make one. Exploring new foods is oh so much fun! I will let you know about my food endeavors.
Till Next Time
Today I spent studying and doing homework at Beans and Brew, where the coffee is amazingly yummy the tables are comfy and oddly enough didn't feel awkward with all my stuff there. As I was studying Human Anatomy A song came on. A specific song that I never remember then name of but the song will be imbedded in my mind till the end of time. I have a few names for it, the wake up call, the drum song, and the lincoln song (which I don't know if I can call it that since its in my car now)are just a few of the names. It's this song on this random CD that my daddy has had since forever and I haven't heard it in forever which is odd because it is in my car. I couldn't help but smile and laugh and I think the guy sitting by me thought I was going crazy actually I am almost certain of it since he gave me that WTF look, stood up slowly and walked away. honestly do miss the family every time I come back to Utah. the rest of the day wasn't that exciting actually from 9:30 t9ll 5:15 I was doing homework at beans and brew. after that I went to treehouse. I have come to the realization that treehouse has the same people they did last year.all the people leave for the year probably to go to a place where there isn't so much snow then come back to good ol' Draper. It's kind of cool seeing people from last year and watching the reactions they have when they recognize me. Fyi the rain made for some hot cocoa so I took my chocolate flavored protein powder added no more thhttp://www.blogger.com/post-create.g?blogID=2680263413059320538an 1/2 a tablespoon of pero for a little added something, truvia, and hot water of course. it was actually a lot tastier than I expected. Sorry my life isn't that exciting but hopefully that will change soon
Till Next Time
Alright So last night I have been wanting to write a blog that was supposed to be all intense and it was supposed to be about how art imitates life or vice versa. I went to the movies and saw Friends with Benefits with Brad. First thing you need to know is that it was actually hilarious! I laughed so hard through out the entire movie. second off the entire movie brought me back to things that occurred in the past or things that just I really don't like thinking about. The issue now is that I think due to lack of sleep and the fact that I was to happy in services today that I forgot half the stuff that I was thinking about. I can give you the cliff notes version: I can tell you that in the previews I thought about Israel. I don't remember what brought it up but it didn't sit well. basically I thought about getting back in contact with people that I have lost contact with. then when the movie started a bunch of memories came up just the mountains reminded me of hiking and cowles mountain, New York reminds me of when I went to NY with Bekka and can I say as much as I love bekka and love the fact that we got to go to Disneyworld after the fact and I did love New York and being with Bekka in New York but it was a weird trip with some drama and seeing New York in the movie just reminded me of how glad I am to be a west coaster. and there is more to it but I don't want to give anything away about the movie.
Anywho.... Today was great I was productive with homework, and before that I went to services at Kol Ami. I love Kol Ami and I still think it is amazing that I met someone related to the franks. And I get to Usher in a couple of weeks which really isn't a big deal it's just giving out siddurs (prayer books) but for some reason I am so stocked. To top it off I really am thinking about becoming a member and maybe even a board member but I don't even know what to do as a board member. I guess I am just gonna have to ask someone about it.
I don't know if there is much else I can tell you that I remember other than the fact that I got no sleep last night, my apartment is a mess because I am to lazy to clean it up, and I am really excited to say that I added back caffeine to my diet. not an excessive amount (a cup a day) it just feels good not to feel sick after drinking caffeine. anyways gonna do some more school work and turn on the A/C because I cannot take the heat.
Today started out with a fabulous run. I don't know how far I ran I just know two things 1. I ran faster and 2. some snakes tend to run away from you when you are running towards you. no kidding this little snake was chillin on the side walk and as soon as he saw me he booked it as fast as that little poor snake could. little did he know I was just as terrified as him. Once I got back to the apt. I did some homework and then went off to do my grocery shopping for the week. I don't know if you all know this but I love sunflower market. There isn't one in San Diego which is just a shame. It felt so good to shop there and know my way around. FYI I have to tell you about this odd snack. for those of you who don't know this all natural popcorn is actually pretty healthy for you when eaten in moderation and today I wanted some popcorn. So I took my all natural popcorn made a syrup with lemon and stevia and then added cinnamon. I know it sounds a little weird especially the lemon but trust me you have to try it. I did have a protein with it but it wasn't anything special just some sliced turkey. this was pre grocery shopping so I didn't really have anything else. but the popcorn with a great movie was perfect. I watched up in the air with George Clooney and it was amazing. I do have to say that is me to the tee. I love flying I love being in the air and everything that people seem to hate about airports and planes is what I love about airports and planes. If I could I would spend my life on a plane just like him. even the ending hit me a little hard. flying and being nomadic is easy when you don't have anyone to settle down with but if there was a reason to stick to one place to stay in one home then why not. after shopping I made a delicious tilapia dish with paprika, onlions, and carrots it was so simply delicious and I could barely enjoy because right after eating I went to an ab lab where there was a sub who is new to treehouse (at least I think she is). I can't believe I am saying this but I believe she put Derek's class to shame. I was sweating pretty hard. of course I had to do zumba which was amazingly fun! Brenna was way to hyper for life and I feel bad for bailing out early but I had to come back home for some homework. which is why I am blogging :). don't worry I know how to do both at the same time.
So I shall stop writing this blog and continue on with homework.
Till Next Time
I will start with being back home. I am back in SLC after a fabulous breakfast with Bekka who I already miss. I mean seriously we barely got to hang out to begin with it's just messed up, I also had to say goodbye to Dorite and Ohad who are going back to Israel thursday. I miss Israel not gonna lie it has been way to long since I have been and believe it or not I think I am totally ready to go back. This morning was bitter sweet. I really did want to come back it was time cause I was missing Utah oh so much and after one odd fun break from Utah I have come to the conclusion that it just feels right to be here. There was just a couple issues with leaving. first off I don't think I got to do enough of what I wanted to do. I wanted to really enjoy a full day with Bekka, I wanted to go to the beach, and I kinda wanted a real life reunion with some people in cali. the second issue was that I left on a very special day for my parents. Today is their 25th anniversary. That's right a quarter of a millennium later and they still love each other oh so very much. To be honest with you they don't spend many anniversaries together so the fact that they get to this year is amazing. You are probably asking why and that is because my parents love each other oh so much that this day as special as it is doesn't make them love each other anymore than they do each and everyday. second reason is because my parents show romance and show their love for each other each and everyday by being there for each other and allowing each other to be their own. meaning that usually every summer my mother is in Israel celebrating by drinking coffee with friends at two in the morning and my dad celebrates by working or by spending time with his mother my grandma. By the way my grandma made them the cutest little gift. I can't wait to hear how much they love it. This morning knowing what today is the first thing that popped into my mind when I woke up this morning was that one song from fiddler on the roof. for those of you who have seen the movie or play you probably know which song for those of you who haven't seen it, let's just say if your Jewish that is a crime to your religion and you don't have the right to know which song I am talking about and if your not my apologize. anyways I have learned a lot about my family this past break and the one thing that I left with was something my mom helped me understand more. true love isn't about that amazing spark or love at first site or any of that movie style love. it is about waking up 25 years later and still loving the person you are with, it is about waking up 25 years later with your kids out of the house and still wanting to spend time with each other, and most importantly it is about waking up 25 years later and still be able to say I am the luckiest person in the world to wake up 25 years later and still love and be in love with the person I have just woken up next to. I am lucky to have had two generations grandparents and parents who have taught me what true love is about.
Happy 25th anniversary!
Till Next Time
So after some good amount of time in Vegas I am going back to sd :(. Before we left we went to get my mom's favorite bread at Paris hotel then to luxor to go through the bodies and titanic exhibitions. First bodies which was amazing. I had two thoughts in my head in there. 1. Kinesiology and everything I am learning. 2. Is a certain someone who is rather knowledgeable friend who I have grown to respect (aside from her love for byu). I think you know who you are *cough* Lisa *cough*. I would have loved to explore that exhibition with you. The other exhibition, titanic was pretty awesome as well. There were rooms where we felt like we were on the ship. When we got to the end they took the idea of the museum of tolerance and gave you a card with a name so you could see if that person was lost or saved. Honestly the way they had it set up was a little confusing so I don't know if my person was lost or saved. Speaking of the museum of tolerance and tolerance in general I have to get something out there... The first day in Vegas we went to walmart for somethings. Nothing special at all. The story comes in when we were at the check out line. There was this guy tattoos from the toes up and one right on the neck that was fairly obvious. It was a neo-nazi tattoo. Of course he has a lovely arian girlfriend on his arm and a stack of beer in the other hand. I don't know why but for some reason this guy bugged me more then usual. I know there are idiots out there like him even worse and in fact dealt with a few but for some reason I have been thinking about this guy for the duration of our trip. I think it is cause we were in Vegas where diversity is the norm. News flash to all bigots out there, Vegas is not the place for you. In fact you all belong on a little island of your own where u can happily have your mentally challenged arian race. Anyways I did have a great time in Vegas and the drive has been filled with school wok, odd smells (fyi seth comes to mind on thay one, try to guess the smell), and a delicious sashimi salad. Now almost in sd and ready to go to bed but I gotta go see grandma first off. Not complaining about that though. I will always make time for grandma. tomorrow I am gonna be back home in south jordan. Going to do school work job hunt and if anyone wants to join start of with dinner somewhere. I think I am craving a steak from applebee's. Till Next Time Nicoly!
I started out my day at gold's gym sd today. It was interesting to say the least. They were cold when I walked in then spin class was just boring. Slow music from the 60s was the start and slow music from the seventies ended it. The bikes actually had gears which at first I thought was cool but it ended up being annoying spin class should be about how hard you can go, not the bike. I spent an hour in this class then checked out the lockers. Is it sad that everytime I check out a gym I look at the showers in the lockers and compare them to the ones at Treehouse? Anyhow I left right after that. Went to sushi with dorite and got a yummy salsa roll, helped Ohad with a magic trick while studying, and lastly I signed up for the AFPA nutrition and wellness certification!! I am so stocked for that. After all of that I had an amazing dinner with danny, justine and Lauren. I haven't seen Lauren in forever it was nice to see her hopefully that dinner will occur again soon. Now I am at the midnight showing of harry potter waiting for the next hour cause the line fore these seats was insane. Love it though cause I am with bekka. Till next time Nicoly
So today is my grammars birthday!!!!! So before I get to her awesomeness let me tell you about my day. It was fabulous! I spent the first half with bells which was great. We went to broken yolk for breakfast where I had my usual. It took me a while to get to that decision too. I went there knowing I wanted my usual looked at the menu thinking maybe I should try something new and debated for a good 10 minutes until I decided that the usual is always yummy so why not. After breakfast we hung out a little bit and watched harry potter. After I had to go run some errands get some sprinkles cupcakes for dinner with grams, and then off to my grammars place. Fyi she loved my gift. It is one of those digital picture frames that holds a bunch of pictures and has a sideshow. I put pictures of the family on it which were perfect! Thank you Marlene for the pictures! Now on to my grandmother, the grams, the rock of this family;... she is by far the greatest out there! She has been that stereotypical grammar who showers us grandkids with food, gifts and more. That more is what makes her special! To explain, while in the hospital she was probably there just as long if not longer than my parents were. As kids we would spend days even weeks sometimes at grandma and grandpa's, playing cards and mahjong. So needless to say she has also been a great friend who deserves a fabulous birthday! Which I do hope it was happy birthday grandma!!! Till Next Time! Nicoly
My morning workout consisted of outdoor intervals with a few exceptions .5 mile flat run with walking at the end of it. Honestly it was excellent! Starting to train for the 5k and can I just say it is a lot harder outdoors than on a tread. An out door 5k I can do in like an hour. For a couple reasons. First is cause I still get some chest pains after running like two miles and second is cause you can't help but slowly slow down tour pace when you run or at least I can't. On a tread all I have to do is put it at one pace that my legs can handle and tell myself that I just have to get to the 5k mark before I pass out. Considering that my legs can handle 6.5 pace on a tread it only takes mr about 30 min. To do a 5k. My goal while training just get to the 5k without walking!!
After my workout of the day the family went to ojai! For those of you who don't know what or where that is, it's a little town right by santa barbara. I went to go visit the little brother at work :(! He is a football coach at camp ramah. Today was visitors day so we totally made it a family get together. A fun one at that. Bummed into some old friends, stole some oranges from their orange grove and now we are on our way back to sd stopping in hollywood for dinner at Aroma. I am stocked I do love aroma. Fyi back to ramah, for those of you who were wondering, soooooo much has changed! There's a new insane ropes coarse, the people are completeuely different and supposedly the food is different. I guess its been a few years since I have been there because it really didn't look like the ramah I went to.
Small negative note: I hate L.A. and the L.A. traffic! wtf! I can run to aroma faster then this car can drive there
Tomorrow is a very special day so if I forget to write a blog for you guys remind me and then just shun me!
Till Next Time
Today is a joyous day! It is independence day in good ol' U.S.A ! Even though it really is incorrect there is a reason its on the forth of july. It's because the declaration of independence was signed on this day. Its a great day to be an american where we have the right to vote for the good and bad that this country has to offer. I do have my two cents about what people have to say about this holiday one big one in particular so if you are offended especially for those in the service, my apologize.... I love my service men and women and will gladly stand next to them in the line of battle but that's not what this holiday is about. We are not praying for those we lost and who are in war at the moment so, we are not celebrating the right we have to be one of them so please set aside the love for them for just a day. The love needs to be given to those who chose to take a pen and sign a daring declaration. We celebrate there wisdom and courage and we celebrate the fact that 100s of years later some of there visions of what this nation would become is still in place and that even though this country has its flaws its still the greatest country out there. Next thing I gotta say is this... happy birthday to one if my greatest cousins, Itay. Times with him is always filled with joy so happy birthday cousin. Luckily you live in Israel so being born on this holiday isn't a big deal. Third is my day today... I ran and did a good workout at home, I cooked something up for kol ami pot luck, worked on my puzzle and now I am at kol ami having a lesson on jews in america while eating yummy food. I really should just become a member already. Waiting for fireworks and learning a great lesson while doing so. I am learning about the three generation hypothesis. I should actually pay attention so... Till Next Time Nicoly!
Alright this week has been rough. I have been trying to get a job and haven't gotten anywhere. after today which by the way I really don't want to here the line "we are not hiring at the moment" ever again. that is all I am hearing. this whole week I think I was told that about 20 times. anyways today was kind of that last straw kind of day. getting depressed about really don't know what I am going to do if I can't find a job. Anywho today after a fabulous set of ab lab and intervals I did more job searching then went to services with the kol ami congregation at wellington. For those of you who don't know what wellington is, it's an assisted living home for the elderly. an amazing complex where the rabbi of Kol ami does a monthly service and a weekly class. I went to the services for two reasons one being I needed something to do and two because I have enjoyed the company of the people of kol ami so why not. The moment I walked in I felt a whole lot better. The rabbi instantly greeted me when I entered and so did a few other congregants that recognixed me, right as I sat down the people at the assistant living came right up to me and said hi and introduced themselves. So already I forgot about life which was fabulous. Services were simple and short which was nice but what really made the night was the traditional rabbi's lesson of the day. She was talking about the parsha of the week. this week is the story of moses hitting the rock rather than asking it for water. The rabbi's lesson was about the point of view of the rock. How as people we should understand what the rock is feeling. I know that sounds crazy but there is a purpose for it. Think about the thought that the rock is thinking please oh please ask me to give you water, ask me to give whatever I can for you ask me to have a purpose. Really kind of summed up my week. all I have been asking is for people to let me give them what I can. Let me work for you, let me give you my labor. As the story went on the rabbi continued by saying we shouldn't just sit there and ask but we should do. hold up a sign saying I can give you this help, whatever talent or gift that is I can give it. for a moment I thought well ya I have been doing that and guess what... no one wants what I can give which is kind of lame. but that isn't what the lesson is about. it is about truly putting yourself out there and I will admit all I have been searching for a jobs that are sub par and honestly I am probably over qualified. so starting this week (monday since tomorrow is shabbat and nothing is opened on sundays I will be going all over the place to search for someone who needs what I can give. hopefull it works if not I really don't know what I will do.
but it did really cheer me up to here the lesson. it reminds me that everyone has similar struggles in life even if it is just a rock. So I leave you with that!
Till Next TIme